Lord Acton once said:

Liberty is the prevention of control by others. This requires self-control and, therefore, religious and spiritual influences; education, knowledge, well-being.

While this saying is at least a century old, it’s true today as it was a century ago. I can claim with confidence that all of us seek some sort of liberty. We want to be our own bosses, become financially independent, or control what’s happening in our lives. Many goals we set depend solely on our efforts. And unlike a century ago, the Internet age has enabled us to get the necessary information instantly, and learn how to grow to be who we really want to be. In this post I won’t go into religious or spiritual influences. But if you’re struggling to achieve your dreams and seek ways to get you closer to your own liberation – keep on reading (and no, I’m not selling anything *just_yet*).

Realizing what we control and what we do not – is key to defining realistic goals and making things happen. This article might not teach you anything you don’t already know, but it should be able to put some perspective on things you control versus things that you think control you.

Consider this: we can control our thoughts. Shocking, isn’t it? Don’t take my word for it: google it and get not less than 56 million results. Yes, people are talking about it for some time now, sharing experiences and developing ideas, and you might have missed it while thinking about something else! Don’t worry, you won’t have to read them all. Here’s a sample of what all the buzz is about.

Monitor your thoughts

In other words: shut up and listen. What is it you’re thinking of right now? Where did this thought come from? How long have you been thinking about it? Try not to get in the way. Don’t do anything, just listen. This, of course, should be done in the right setting, and not in a middle of a business meeting. Just take your time with them one on one and pay attention.

Welcome your thoughts

They are not a burden. They are a welcomed guest. They come and go, but if you let them, they might just bring a present. What will it be? A precious gift of a long lost memory? A surprising angle for looking at what’s bothering you? A sudden realization how to solve a problem you’ve been facing? When you welcome your thoughts – you advance from being passive, and just doing your thing, to actively starting to experience the thought process.

Filter your thoughts

There it is again: a negative thought sneaks in. Fear, sadness, anger, frustration, insecurity… It’s now you against the world and you know what’s coming next. You will waste precious time being sad or mad, and there’s nothing you can do about it, right? Well, not this time. This time stop and ask yourself if what you’re focusing on at the moment gets you any closer to where you want to be. And if it doesn’t, what is the reason for you to linger on negative thoughts? Why not do something about it? Would you rather stay at home miserable when you know your hot date is waiting for you at the coffee shop? No, that’s irrational – you should be there in a minute! Now all is left is some simple reasoning: if you already got to that negative place and you know it’s bad for you – staying in that place doesn’t make you any wiser. Try to filter these particular thoughts out of your thought process and concentrate on your goals, your dreams and how to get there instead.

Control your thoughts

This one gets easier with time and practice, but basically after you’ve been monitoring, welcoming and filtering your thoughts for a while – you are now ready to turn the negative ones into positive notes for future action. Say hello to Insecurity, for example:

Hi Insecurity! What’s that? Am I gaining weight again? Why, thank you! Thanks for noticing that it’s important for me to stay fit! I’ll be sure to remember that next time I’m reaching for that Twinkie. Oh, and I think it’s time to renew that gym membership, as well. Well, thanks a lot and bye for now!

See what you did there? Congratulations! You’ve managed to gain control and turn a common negative thought into a positive future goal and action, instead of beating yourself up in front of the mirror. You don’t need a dialogue with the thought per se, just find what works best for you.

After you begin to actively experience your thought process – it gets much easier gaining control of everything else. The reasoning stays simple: if it’s good for you – do it. If you don’t know if it’s good for you – pay attention, monitor, and learn. If it’s worth your while – invest the time and the required resources into it. And if it stands in the way – filter it out. Be sure to define what you want clearly and concisely, and be persistent. But I guess you knew all that already.

Here’s to one step closer to liberty.

Have you enjoyed this post? Have you tried any of these techniques? What were the results? You should definitely comment and share this article.